Ode to Cheese

You know that cozy feeling of a thick woolen sweater?

I find the same warmth in a big block of cheddar

 

For fancy occasions though, I choose gruyere

Nothing like strong odors at a black tie affair

 

If you were to offer me some gorgonzola

I’d be so overjoyed that I’d accidentally pull a

 

Hamstring while throwing a one-man dance party

Don’t even get me started on a slice of havarti

 

If it’s just a few of us hangin’ at a low-key kickback

I wouldn’t say no to some Monterey Jack

 

As for lonely nights, I just sprinkle on shaved parmesan

And suddenly find all my worries are gone

 

When my attempts to extort information fall short

I bolster my words with a mouthful of Roquefort

 

Mozzarrella, was it you who lost your glass slipper at the ball?

Or was that another Ella, I cannot recall

 

Provolone and swiss make for turkey sandwich bliss

And it would be rude-a to not include-a gouda

But cottage cheese, fuck you

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